Dad and June at Summer Palace.
Mom and Ping at Summer Palace
Dad at the entrance of Summer Palace "drawing a crowd"
Mom, Dad and I at Tianamen Square.
Beijing with my family was nothing like I could have ever anticipated. I've now made my way to the Yunnan province. This begins my solo adventure. I'm excited about what is coming but right now I'm just in a place of amazement. I'm not in amazement because I'm in Southern China. I'm not in amazement because I'm getting to travel in S.E. Asia for 5 weeks. No, I'm in amazement because of the human connection that transpired between complete strangers over the course of 3 days. The last 3 days gave my parents and I some of the most precious gifts of our lives. I knew we'd get to spend some time with a former student, Joy, and I knew we'd get to have a meal with her family. We did that. However, I had no idea that her family would take my parents and I under their wing during our stay in their home"town" and shower us with grace, time, and care.
Like I wrote previously on Wednesday Joy and her father accompanied us to the Great Wall. We never should have dared our trip without them. I'm pretty sure we wouldn't have although I might have tried. I prefer the "get out to where the people are" kind of travel.
Wednesday Joy joined us as we visited the Forbidden City, Tianamen Square and a mall. Another one of KNU's former students also joined us. I got to reunite with two former KNU students! During the day June, Joy's father, called Joy to make sure things were going well. Joy was doing a spectacular job helping us and with Wang Ju, the other former KNU student, we were well taken care of.
Yesterday, Friday, was another spectacular day. June borrowed an SUV(Chevy) from his nephew so that he could take my dad (and the rest of us) in comfort to the Summer Palace. It is a little more than an hour drive from down town Beijing by car. However, by public transport it could be as long as 3 hours. My dad had fared very well on public transport on our trip to the Great Wall but it was beautifully clear that June wanted to make sure my dad would see the Palace with as little discomfort as possible. We drove to the Summer Palace in style! The SUV only had 600 or so kilometers on it. It was brand new!! It was the epitome of comfort in Beijing!
We met at the hotel at 6:30am. As we walked to the car Joy and June said they had a surprise for us. I had only a hunch of what it might be. Maybe Joy's mom? Yep! There she was smiling from ear to ear as she poked her head from the back seat so we could see her. My mom yelled in excitement and Ping, Joy's mom, reciprocated by clapping her hands and welcoming us with her bousterous laugh and teeth grinning smile.
There was a special chemistry between the fathers and the mothers. Joy did a great deal of translation between our parents. Laughter filled our day. My dad's sarcastic humor seemed to be a hit. I watched June smile with gratefulness as he walked with my father. Often he would call out "Ray" and ask for a picture with my dad. June loved to stand in front of my towering father with his hands out to his sides. Joy said she's been trying to get her dad to lose some weight. However, in the presence of my father he feels tiny! I think June loved being seen with the foreign giant. People would come up everywhere we went and ask politely for a picture with my father. Sometimes they wouldn't ask. People would walk next to my father and send their friend out in front to snap the picture in walking pursuit. June was the host of this walking giant and it looked to be a priveledged blessing.
Ping, Joy's mom, is in some ways the Chinese replica of my mom. One of the similarities is their love for music. My mom has been playing the harp for about 8 years now. Ping plays the Chinese harp. The night we arrived and joined the family for dinner we were welcomed to the families home for a mini-concert. Ping has only been playing the Chinese harp for 6 months but she played with the confidence of a pro. My mom was in heaven as she shared the love of music with Ping. The women were so grateful and surprised by the serendipitous commonality.
During the day I found my mom and Ping humming music together. They found a song they both knew. Here these two ladies were walking together in the Summer Palace, they couldn't speak English or Chinese to each other however they shared the language of music. They connected through their music. Ping brought her harp book with her and for part of the afternoon my mom and Ping sat together reviewing the music. It was like watching two young girls on the playground. They were laughing at each other and with each other. I loved watching them together. It was precious to see a Chinese mother and an American mother connecting through a common love--music.
The grounds of the Summer Palace are vast. By mid-day my dad was wiped. He decided he couldn't do anymore stairs. My dad commented that stairs were invented in Beijing. Ha. Everyone except for Joy's father had entered into a special temple area of the Palace. At one point we stood before yet another staircase afterr three or four long ones already and this was where my father said, "OK, I'm not going up anymore but you guys can." We separated with him. Mistake number one. The girls went on and my dad went down and out of the temple area. Mistake number two was not confirming a meeting place. Yes, we lost my 6 foot 8 father in China. I know it is hard to believe but we did. When we girls returned to the temple opening we were surprised not to find my father. We wrongly assumed he hadn't walked very far. Afterall we all knew he was exhausted.
We split into two groups and began looking for him. For the next 2 hours we searched up and down stairs. Keep in mind that it must have been 90 degrees with 80 to 90 percent humidity. June took the lead and organized us. He sent Joy and I to the top of the temple--more stairs for us. He had my mom and Ping wait at the gate. He searched the grounds. No luck! Next he and Joy looked again up and down the temple grounds--mores stairs for them. I sat at the gate. My mom now went walking on the general palace grounds. Still no Giant Ray! We finally got smart and headed to the entrance of the palace. This was only after going to security and calling out my dad's name on the intercom system. "Ray from America your family is looking for you. Go to the front entrance." My dad was sitting at the front entrance! He had walked straight there after we left him on the stairs at the temple grounds. He had needed a restroom and the first one he found was all the way at the front gate! He had no money with him. He was covered in sweat and couldn't even buy water.
2 hours! We searched and he waited for 2 hours. Yet Joy's mom and dad were so cool about it. Even my dad was cool. As soon as we found my dad Joy's parents put our search behind them and went on with a joy filled day. They were glad my dad was ok and they were even more happy to show him the rest of the palace. My dad said, "You mean you haven't seen it all already?" He was hoping we had and half expecting we were ready to leave the Palace. I said, "No dad, we were looking for you!" My family had no idea how big the palace was. We had only seen a tiny portion. The rest of the day June stayed even closer to my father. He took special care to make sure we didn't lose him but even more he assured my dad's comfort.
At some point during the day I learned that my parents are the first foreigners Joy's parents have ever spent time with. Joy and I both shared how special the connection was between our parents. We also shared the surprise by how well our parents enjoyed and appreciated the other. We both went into the week with some apprehension concerning the unknown. Would they like each other? Would they offend each other? Would they be able to have fun together. It was clear to both of us that something special was happening before us.
My family convinced Joy's family to join us for dinner. We wanted to treat them. They agreed but treating them was harder than we anticipated. We went to the restaurant chain that originated the "Peking Duck". June had to join us late due to a work responsibility. Dinner was fun as usual. After dinner and as we were getting into the Taxi June pulled his daughter over to translate a personal word to my father. I couldn't hear it all. What I did hear touched me deeply. I heard June tell his daughter and his daughter tell my father, "You are like a brother." All day I had witnessed a growing affection in June for my father. I know that in the Chinese culture that hand holding is a sign of friendship. June definitely showed that sign of friendship at times during the day to my father. June's sincerity, his hospitality, and his care for my dad clearly touched my father. My dad was simply blown out of the water with kindness.
As I reflect on this past week I realize something profound happened for all of us. People made all the difference. People invited my family into their space--even their homes--and shared a little piece of life with them. It didn't matter were we were from or what language we didn't speak. Connections were made. My parents got to experience Korean and China is very special ways. They learned of Korea and China through some spectacular people. I hadn't had high hopes for their liking both places. And I'm sure if we only went to the tourist sites alone they wouldn't have apprecitated Korea or China. However, in the people they found great beauty and deep love.
I've been experienicing transforming hospitality in the last few years. And in the last week my parents got a taste of this kind of hospitality too. We were all blown out of the water!
Like I wrote previously on Wednesday Joy and her father accompanied us to the Great Wall. We never should have dared our trip without them. I'm pretty sure we wouldn't have although I might have tried. I prefer the "get out to where the people are" kind of travel.
Wednesday Joy joined us as we visited the Forbidden City, Tianamen Square and a mall. Another one of KNU's former students also joined us. I got to reunite with two former KNU students! During the day June, Joy's father, called Joy to make sure things were going well. Joy was doing a spectacular job helping us and with Wang Ju, the other former KNU student, we were well taken care of.
Yesterday, Friday, was another spectacular day. June borrowed an SUV(Chevy) from his nephew so that he could take my dad (and the rest of us) in comfort to the Summer Palace. It is a little more than an hour drive from down town Beijing by car. However, by public transport it could be as long as 3 hours. My dad had fared very well on public transport on our trip to the Great Wall but it was beautifully clear that June wanted to make sure my dad would see the Palace with as little discomfort as possible. We drove to the Summer Palace in style! The SUV only had 600 or so kilometers on it. It was brand new!! It was the epitome of comfort in Beijing!
We met at the hotel at 6:30am. As we walked to the car Joy and June said they had a surprise for us. I had only a hunch of what it might be. Maybe Joy's mom? Yep! There she was smiling from ear to ear as she poked her head from the back seat so we could see her. My mom yelled in excitement and Ping, Joy's mom, reciprocated by clapping her hands and welcoming us with her bousterous laugh and teeth grinning smile.
There was a special chemistry between the fathers and the mothers. Joy did a great deal of translation between our parents. Laughter filled our day. My dad's sarcastic humor seemed to be a hit. I watched June smile with gratefulness as he walked with my father. Often he would call out "Ray" and ask for a picture with my dad. June loved to stand in front of my towering father with his hands out to his sides. Joy said she's been trying to get her dad to lose some weight. However, in the presence of my father he feels tiny! I think June loved being seen with the foreign giant. People would come up everywhere we went and ask politely for a picture with my father. Sometimes they wouldn't ask. People would walk next to my father and send their friend out in front to snap the picture in walking pursuit. June was the host of this walking giant and it looked to be a priveledged blessing.
Ping, Joy's mom, is in some ways the Chinese replica of my mom. One of the similarities is their love for music. My mom has been playing the harp for about 8 years now. Ping plays the Chinese harp. The night we arrived and joined the family for dinner we were welcomed to the families home for a mini-concert. Ping has only been playing the Chinese harp for 6 months but she played with the confidence of a pro. My mom was in heaven as she shared the love of music with Ping. The women were so grateful and surprised by the serendipitous commonality.
During the day I found my mom and Ping humming music together. They found a song they both knew. Here these two ladies were walking together in the Summer Palace, they couldn't speak English or Chinese to each other however they shared the language of music. They connected through their music. Ping brought her harp book with her and for part of the afternoon my mom and Ping sat together reviewing the music. It was like watching two young girls on the playground. They were laughing at each other and with each other. I loved watching them together. It was precious to see a Chinese mother and an American mother connecting through a common love--music.
The grounds of the Summer Palace are vast. By mid-day my dad was wiped. He decided he couldn't do anymore stairs. My dad commented that stairs were invented in Beijing. Ha. Everyone except for Joy's father had entered into a special temple area of the Palace. At one point we stood before yet another staircase afterr three or four long ones already and this was where my father said, "OK, I'm not going up anymore but you guys can." We separated with him. Mistake number one. The girls went on and my dad went down and out of the temple area. Mistake number two was not confirming a meeting place. Yes, we lost my 6 foot 8 father in China. I know it is hard to believe but we did. When we girls returned to the temple opening we were surprised not to find my father. We wrongly assumed he hadn't walked very far. Afterall we all knew he was exhausted.
We split into two groups and began looking for him. For the next 2 hours we searched up and down stairs. Keep in mind that it must have been 90 degrees with 80 to 90 percent humidity. June took the lead and organized us. He sent Joy and I to the top of the temple--more stairs for us. He had my mom and Ping wait at the gate. He searched the grounds. No luck! Next he and Joy looked again up and down the temple grounds--mores stairs for them. I sat at the gate. My mom now went walking on the general palace grounds. Still no Giant Ray! We finally got smart and headed to the entrance of the palace. This was only after going to security and calling out my dad's name on the intercom system. "Ray from America your family is looking for you. Go to the front entrance." My dad was sitting at the front entrance! He had walked straight there after we left him on the stairs at the temple grounds. He had needed a restroom and the first one he found was all the way at the front gate! He had no money with him. He was covered in sweat and couldn't even buy water.
2 hours! We searched and he waited for 2 hours. Yet Joy's mom and dad were so cool about it. Even my dad was cool. As soon as we found my dad Joy's parents put our search behind them and went on with a joy filled day. They were glad my dad was ok and they were even more happy to show him the rest of the palace. My dad said, "You mean you haven't seen it all already?" He was hoping we had and half expecting we were ready to leave the Palace. I said, "No dad, we were looking for you!" My family had no idea how big the palace was. We had only seen a tiny portion. The rest of the day June stayed even closer to my father. He took special care to make sure we didn't lose him but even more he assured my dad's comfort.
At some point during the day I learned that my parents are the first foreigners Joy's parents have ever spent time with. Joy and I both shared how special the connection was between our parents. We also shared the surprise by how well our parents enjoyed and appreciated the other. We both went into the week with some apprehension concerning the unknown. Would they like each other? Would they offend each other? Would they be able to have fun together. It was clear to both of us that something special was happening before us.
My family convinced Joy's family to join us for dinner. We wanted to treat them. They agreed but treating them was harder than we anticipated. We went to the restaurant chain that originated the "Peking Duck". June had to join us late due to a work responsibility. Dinner was fun as usual. After dinner and as we were getting into the Taxi June pulled his daughter over to translate a personal word to my father. I couldn't hear it all. What I did hear touched me deeply. I heard June tell his daughter and his daughter tell my father, "You are like a brother." All day I had witnessed a growing affection in June for my father. I know that in the Chinese culture that hand holding is a sign of friendship. June definitely showed that sign of friendship at times during the day to my father. June's sincerity, his hospitality, and his care for my dad clearly touched my father. My dad was simply blown out of the water with kindness.
As I reflect on this past week I realize something profound happened for all of us. People made all the difference. People invited my family into their space--even their homes--and shared a little piece of life with them. It didn't matter were we were from or what language we didn't speak. Connections were made. My parents got to experience Korean and China is very special ways. They learned of Korea and China through some spectacular people. I hadn't had high hopes for their liking both places. And I'm sure if we only went to the tourist sites alone they wouldn't have apprecitated Korea or China. However, in the people they found great beauty and deep love.
I've been experienicing transforming hospitality in the last few years. And in the last week my parents got a taste of this kind of hospitality too. We were all blown out of the water!
2 comments:
wow, julene! that's almost all i can say. i'm soooo glad you had such a great time with your p's. i saw them at church and they were so excited to talk about the trip -- it was obvious they had a fantastic time. i hope to get together with them sometime to hear more.
have fun on your solo travel and be safe! i can't wait to see you when you get back to the u.s.! say hi to vietnam for me!
HI Betsy!
Glad you got to talk to the family after their trip. I bet they are jet lagged. I will say hello to Vietnam for you. So you in the fall!
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